


Spoilers

by thesometimeswarrior



Category: Doctor Who
Genre: Drama, Episode: s04e09 Forest of the Dead, Originally Posted on FanFiction.Net, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-06
Updated: 2015-06-06
Packaged: 2018-04-03 04:32:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 394
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4086982
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thesometimeswarrior/pseuds/thesometimeswarrior
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>River Song's last thoughts as she sacrifices herself for the Doctor.</p><p>Originally posted on FF.net in August, 2010.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Spoilers

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone! This is one of my first fics. I wrote this in 2010--just after Series 5 aired--so obviously we had no idea at this point what the whole River/Melody Narrative was. I suppose, therefore, that this is could technically be canon any more. But I think it still captures a lot of the spirit of their relationship.
> 
> I hope you enjoyed!

Somehow, I always knew he'd be there at my death, from the moment I first met him. There was something in his eyes, something I can't explain, that relayed the message, something that spoke to a part of me that I never knew existed.

I didn't trust him back then, couldn't trust him back them, or anyone, not in the type of work I was in. But there was something about him that drew me in, like a sun, and I was stuck in the closet orbit imaginable. It was the way he seemed to care about, not me, there have been plenty of people who have seemed to care about me, and in truth have felt exactly the opposite, but everyone, everything around him, from the smallest creature, to the mightiest galaxy. See, this man felt something extraordinary for the entire universe. His compassion drew me to him without my consent, and it gently pried my heart open.

I didn't know, couldn't know, that he knew how I'd die, but there was a part of me that thought perhaps it didn't matter. He'd introduced me to so many things: Time and Space. Running, the way we two used to do it. Myself. And most importantly, the one thing I thought was a fairy tale.

I look at him now, the man that will become My Doctor, no, the man who is My Doctor. I can see it, the same compassion in his eyes as when I first met him. There's something I want to say to this Doctor, My Doctor, three words that I could never bring myself to utter, never bring myself to believe in.

And now he wants to know why he'd told me his name. He never told me the reason, but I knew, I always knew. It's the same thing that shines through his eyes as he runs through the universe, the same emotion that wells up inside of his two hearts every time he meets anyone, the same thing I ache to tell him now, scream through all of Time and Space so that anywhere he goes, it'll be in is soul.

So I tell him the only way I can, tell him the word that has been the staple of our life together for so long, that has been synonymous with those three from the start.

"Spoilers."


End file.
